Oh Dear.

So I have a few conundrums to solve.

First. Truth telling.

Mrs. Maiden's Mum is from the Ottawa area. She, in fact, was most likely born in a little house in Westboro. Grandma's best friend is thus from around the area too. In fact, she lives in Kingston, and because we have met, and she is kind and a good friend of the family, I have included her on the family Valentine Christmas card list. And she would occasionally call and we would catch up and promise a visit. Which never happened.

When MasterP was quite young, I'll bet several months old, Mrs. M called. That was not unusual. The problem was is that she explained how much she was missing her good friends, my grandparents. Oh, I said. Yes. I understand perfectly. I do. I miss them too, really.

How are they? she asked, point blank. Well, I said, (stalling for time, and shocked, because truthfully, Grandma died in 1990, and my grandfather in 2004 - the summer I was pregnant with MlleL.) Uh, well, I said, deciding in that instant that it really couldn't hurt to let her keep them alive in her memory, they're doing fine. Oh? she said, Where are they now; I seem to have lost their address? In Quebec, still, I said. Doing very well. Do you have their number handy, she asked? Oh, I said, well, it's just that with the baby and all I don't really know where my address book is at the moment......

That's ok, dear, she said, I'll call back.

But she didn't. And I felt awful. I mean. How do you tell someone their best friend died almost 20 years ago? Even worse, how do you chicken out and tell her that they're alive and well and still living in their retirement home in Quebec???

As it happens, telling the truth as an option goes something like this. Several nights ago, she called again, this time, asking for Lil. I asked who was calling, as I had a feeling I knew. A friend of hers, she explained, Lil was going to pick me up in the morning for a meeting and I needed to cancel because I think I'm coming down with a cold.

I explained who I was several times, and she was understandably confused. But why do I have Lil written down here? And who are Mr. and Mrs. Maiden? Those are my parents. I'm so sorry to tell you, my dear, that Lil died some time ago. Oh, she said, was it fast? I'm sorry, but no it wasn't, really.

Oh......

That didn't feel any better. Next time, I think I am just going to promise to pass the message on. Next time, I think I might just pretend to be Lil. We resemble each other very much, she and I - could it be that bad???